"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, DESERVE your love and affection" Gautama Buddha.
I want to open with this as it is so true, in our busy lives we tend to forget about ourselves as we make sure our partners, children, parents, friends, pets are all OK. We run errands, work, attend school activities, volunteer, become board members, help out at school, socialise and after a while it all becomes too much. We burn out, because we have made no time or energy for ourselves. I have learnt if I put myself first, I have MORE time and energy for everyone I love. I have MORE time and energy to keep doing everything I love to do and everything I have to do. Here are my 5 thoughts on how to start loving yourself the way you deserve to be loved;
1. SMILE - it costs nothing and it is infectious. When you smile you automatically feel better. Consciously take time each day to smile, even if you are by yourself remember to take notice of how it makes you feel.
2. Live your OWN life, don't interfere or judge others as everyone is on their own journey. I know this is easier said than done, but it really is key. Once I stopped worrying about what anyone else was doing and who said what to who and who had this and who had that. I felt lighter and freer because I was no longer drawn into the drama or the comparison game. Be proud of yourself and where you are in this moment. If you don't like where you are change it! Only you can do this, don't wait for somebody else to give you permission.
3.Make PEACE with your PAST. You can't change it, you can only learn from it. You effectively become a better, wiser, smarter person than you were before and that is called progress. Cut ties, remove toxic people from your life. You don't have to remain friends or in a relationship with someone if it no longer works for you. Clear YOUR baggage. Write a letter to yourself, forgiving yourself. This allows you to move forward and if you ever feel like you are getting dragged back into the past, re-read the letter.
4. Live in the PRESENT. A famous quote says "Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present." Alice Morse Earle.
This is so true, by staying in the present moment we can't dwell on the past and we can't worry about the future. Try to live in the moment you will be amazed at how exciting this can be. A great tool to help you do this is Mindfulness, if you haven't heard about it google it. If you have heard about it google it again and look at some of the ways this technique can help you live in the moment.
5. Ditch your INNER Critique. We are our own worst enemies. I believe our brains are programmed to remember the bad and it is a fear based, survival mechanism. It does not work for us in this day and age! We remember everything nasty or mean anybody says to us and most of us forget the compliments or we don't believe them. You are in charge of your thoughts and by changing your minds viewpoint you can effectively change your thoughts. Break the Cycle. Here is an example; every time you think 'I failed at ....' think about what you gained from that failure ' This experience has made more..... resilient? stronger? knowledgeable? When your inner critique starts talking, STOP. Take a breath. Acknowledge what it is saying then reword into a positive statement. You will have to do this for a while as the brain is persistent. Remember it takes three weeks to break a habit!
I hope this brings you happiness, peace and something to ponder!
